* This blog post is completely self indulgent. If you could care less about my very painful break up with Payless Shoe Source, I won't be offended.
Dear Purveyors of Cheap Footwear-
As a woman blessed with a 12/13 shoe size, I once thought you were the answer to the prayers I sent up to the shoe Gods asking for cute sandals and funky flats made for my big feet, sold for less than an arm and the leg to which said feet are attached. I thought Payless was going to quell the jealousy I felt toward smaller-footed friends who could pop into DSW or Target and emerge with three boxes of on-trend, seasonally appropriate shoes. I blogged about the cute shoes I found on the racks in your stores and on your website. I thought we were happy, Facebook Official even (to borrow a term from the kids these days). Looking back on those blissful, care-free days I couldn’t have known our love would fizzle and die a painful death.
What once burned inside me as passion for your footwear now burns as fury for your poor online customer service. Your online search methods are ridiculous – when I filter by shoe size, do not show me a bunch of shoes that I desperately want only to find upon clicking “Add to Bag” that they don’t actually come in my shoe size. That’s just mean. And annoying. And time consuming.
When I place an order, do not ship the order short a pair of shoes…with zero notification beforehand…and then tell me in a canned email response that due to a system glitch I shouldn’t have even been able to order the shoes…and then not offer some kind of coupon to make it up to me.
And most certainly, do not repeat this entire process again the very next time I order! AND THEN – do not delay 3 weeks to bill me for my order. It is incredibly inconvenient to have to mentally subtract from my special Shopping Checking Account the cost of the shoes I’ve been wearing for almost a month. I feel as though you are specifically waiting for me to miscalculate a couple cents here or there. At that exact moment is when your bill will go through and I will get to pay an overdraft fee (basically the equivalent of the shoes that your system let me order even when it shouldn’t have).
And your selection of product actually available in store? Please. Don’t get me started. Hello – I can SEE all the cute shoes available in other sizes. But not available for me to purchase and wear same day. Ugh. You are dead to me. I’m serious. You can kiss the $11,000 I probably would have spent on your shoes over the course of my lifetime (assuming I live until I’m 80) goodbye. Don't call. Don't write. It's not me; it's you.